It's a c-c-c… A c-c-c… A Classified update!

At the whim of dark forces unseen, what was originally just a batch-patch of fixes and balance changes has mutated overnight into the Team Fortress 2 Classified CHILLING HALLOWEEN SPECIAL! We aren't really accountable for what the dark forces do, you understand, but you can blame us if it makes you feel better.

You'll be CHILLING in our twisted horror freakshow hellscape nightmare of a game until November 1st, whereupon the holiday theming will come off and we'll all pretend this was just a normal update.

For the duration of the Halloween event, the Team Fortress 2 Classified mercs will be dressed up as demented serial killers, like always.

What's new is they'll also be wearing paper masks of ghouls, goblins, pumpkin kings, fish people, Martian kill-bots, and other cryptids pulled from the annals of famed monster slayers Abbott and Costello.

On a forsaken Halloween re-skin of Drizzle, the Civilian will toddle to the Escape Zone shrouded in the cheapest, lousiest moth-eaten costume his escorts could throw over his head. This ghoulish getup, a cross between a ghost and a clown, intends to draw upon Classified players' two greatest fears: having clean bedsheets and experiencing sincere joy.

Beware: enemy players who menace the Civilian too closely will be frightened into helplessness! And in our experience, enemy players who are frightened into helplessness will be beaten to death with an umbrella or beak-tipped walking stick!

Sunnyside and Drizzle died twenty years ago, you saw it, you saw them die, this can't be real, but they're back, and they've both been given the event-map treatment! Jack-o'-lanterns, wax candles, paper bats, pumpkins with dynamite in them, pumpkins with the usual pumpkin stuff in them, etc.

Dreadful strands the Civilians in an even stormier coalworks complex, built over an even more haunted coal mine. Don your (honestly kind of insensitive) ghost clown costume, and embody the restless spirits of this ancient coal-miner burial ground to terrify your foes.

Spookyside's ghostly hens do not lay eggs! Instead, for reasons too upsetting to contemplate, they lay pieces of Krandy Corn, which grant a brief crit boost to anyone who collects them.